27 November 2007

Boo to Bureaucracy

3 weeks are all that stand between me and the great unknown (i.e. France,this energy I'm involved with...)
I'm still planning on studying in France. It's gettin' hard for yer girl though because the French are striking(per usual), rioting in les banlieues(the "ghettos"/projects/hoods/wards)(per usual) and being a nuisance to Americans (me in the instance)
I have to get a visa. This is not a work visa. If I work there I will be an illegal immigrant. Which is oddly appealing for me to be in France,because really what are they going to do to me? Retreat?
Anyway, on their consulate websites they say you have to go a specific one based on your region. I find that to be incredibly and undeniably whack with a capital feckless! Just because I happen to be posted up in OK, or NE doesn't mean i shouldn't be able to go D.C.(which will be most convenient for me) to get the visa which is just a blimey stamp!
I talked to several French women I'm sure I could take if I had to, who acted as if my desire to go where I wanted to go to get my visa done was ludicrous.
One lady in particular,after relaying my predicament, remarked,as if I asked for her commentary "Why would you want to do that?"
She almost made me lose my mind...and my manners.
I hope everything works out. I really do.
Right now a lot of factors are making it look kind of dubious...

18 November 2007

Tears Dry on their Own

So there's this trite cliche (redundant i know) that says "the person worth your tears won't make you cry".
I don't know how I feel about that. Because there's this guy I know who hasn't made me cry,but maybe might have had me on the verge...
Life and relationships are complex. As Maroon 5 says "it' snot always rainbows and butterflies it's compromise that moves us along".
I've acknowledged that there are some things I will have to change but "I'd rather live in his world than live without him in mine."
That's how I feel right now at least.
That could change if he doesn't get his life right.

So little to do, so much time...strike that reverse it.

*our loss to ephing tech yesterday made me curse.aloud. multiple times. i'd rather not discuss it ever again.
*i had my education abroad orientation yesterday and i am overwhelmed,but more focused i think. there's so much to do before i can chunk up the deuce to the south and the north. but i'm mentally ready. the emotional readiness won't hit me until...the flight?

Things I must do:
*get ticket
*get visa
*get packed to move out of norman temporarily
*get coverage for repatriation of remains, haha. but seriously.
*decide what i'm doing this summer...
*get my life right.

*we have 3 weeks of school left and i don't want to do anything academic associated. does that make me a bad person? maybe,but i'm okay with that.

04 November 2007

Beautiful Surprise...

Beautiful Surprise
"It's like yesterday I didn't even know your name
Now todayYou're always on my mind
I never could have predicted that I'd feel this way
You are a beautiful surprise
Intoxicated every time I hear your voice
You've got me on a natural high
It's almost like I didn't even have a choice
You are a beautiful surprise
Whatever it is that you came to teach me
I am here to learn it cause
I believe that we are written in the stars
I don't know what the future hold
But I'm living in the moment
And I'm thankful for the man that you are, you are, you are
You are everything I ask for in my prayers
So I know my angels brought you to my life
Your energy is healing to my soul
You are a beautiful surprise
You are an inspiration to my life
You are the reason why I smile
You are a beautiful surprise"
So there's this guy/man/energy in my life that has made me so happy. He just popped back in my life a couple of weeks after four months. Instead of questioning his poor timing we just went with it and it's been beautiful. I don't know what"it" is,but it's good and brings me so much happiness. I'm trying not to get caught up,but he makes me think poetry and speak songs.
That's it.